Sunday, November 28, 2010

Repost: There is Always More

These words are more than a message to a love. They are more than a means to communicate my appreciation for the unique love we share.

No dictionary has ever defined such a love. Therefore it would prove futile if I attempted to convey its density in any form of writing. Neither poem, song, nor any other art form could adequately capture the essence of the rapture that has imprisoned me.

This is more than a declaration of love. It is more a promise to love you forever. However, I can not promise my love will go unchanged. By the time you are done reading, my love will have grown deeper, but only because I wouldn't have it any other way.

This is more than a way to turn my heart inside out and reveal its content to my best friend. Its more than an outcry by which I iterate my vow to henceforth be loyal and true.
I could claim this is my way of expressing, to a love I cherish deeply, how much you mean to me. That, however, would not be honest. For, this passage is much more than that.

I must add, every moment that we are not together I'm wishing we were. But still there is more.

This confession mustn't be construed as a mere plea for much longed for physical intimacy. My thirst for your affection lies deeper than lust.

It could be said that I'm clearing my head. Airing my thoughts. Releasing pent up emotions that boil through my veins when I think of you. But, somehow, it is still more than that.

This outpouring of my soul provides an excuse to dwell in the warmth that consumes me whenever I reminisce about the joy you brought into my life. While doing so I'm reminded how worthy you are of all the love I have to give. And, it is more than this too.

Here, I swear to be an asset to the rest of your life. I shall be your friend, confidant, and loving companion for the rest of both our days.

You see Love, no matter how much my love inspires me to do for you, I will always be willing to do more.

And; if there is ever a question as to who adores you most, no matter who the competition is, the answer will always be me.

Despite all I've written, I can not say my point has been made. But, as you read, you should be reminded of at least a portion of the unfathomable depths of love I feel for you.

More importantly, when it comes to the love I will die giving you, you can be assured there will always be much, much, more!
.  .  .  .

You will note this is my first time ever reposting a work on this blog. This morning I'm forced to do so. When I wrote this poem it was about a love I imagined/hoped I'd find.

Now I have found her! 

Saturday, November 27, 2010

Christmas in Collinsville Holiday Art and Author Festival

A week from today Collinville, IL will be hosting a celebration during which Uptown will be blanketed in the festive decorum of the Christmas season.
During this festival,  http://www.supamanscribes.com/  Domino's Pizza and the Collinsville Library will be hosting an Holiday Art and Author Festival at the Blume house from 2-8pm.

The Blume House is located next door to the Collinsville Memorial Library Center.
Address: 406 W. Main St
               Collinsville, IL 62234

A writer's workshop facilitated by Sarah Hietzman Yule will take place from 4-5pm. Along with Sarah, Elizabeth Donald, reporter for The Bellville News-Democrat, Cole Gibson, Bill Iseminger, Debbie Creamer, Kathryn Muelheasler, Diana Lesire Brandermeyer, Ethan Dempsey, Jimmy Dean Jenkins, Andy Carmitchel, and myself will be in attendance on the second floor.

The art display will occur on the first floor. I regretfully know very little about how many artists there will be and who they are. Food and drinks will be available in the Blume House kitchen.

Come join the festivities and meet great local artists and authors.

And, remember, books and art make great gifts. Not many things last forever like they do.

Always real;

Supaman Tion Terrell

PS: After the fair some of us will be celebrating with my friends at Johnny's Sidebar on Main just a few blocks away.

Friday, November 26, 2010

I'm Back!

I haven't been on line for four days. I reached the point where I needed a break. So, I played video games until I couldn't take it anymore. It was great.

Thanksgiving was nice. I spent it with people I didn't know, but they treated me well. I was surprised that not many of the people present knew how Thanksgiving came about. They were amazed to learn that it began when the settlers returned to Europe and reported that God had given them fruitful land in America. Of course this was after genocide had been perpetrated against the Natives who were invited to a feast and then  poisoned.

Which reminds of peoples confusion at why I refuse to call myself a Christian. I feel if I take the title I take it's legacy too. That has nothing to do with my faith in God.

Be that as it may, I have much to be thankful for. I'm loved, supported and assisted in many ways.

Lastly, to the idiot who insists on reminding me that my Teen Open Mic Night flopped and that the planning of the April talent show has been postponed:

I failed! There, you happy?

Now you can find something better to do than relish in the failure of a man who is trying to do something productive with his life. I'm sorry that your life isn't happier. If it were, perhaps you wouldn't enjoy being childish as much as you obviously do.

Always real;
Supaman Tion Terrell

Wednesday, November 17, 2010

A Prison That Shows Men Dignity in Life and in Death ?

I just read an article a friend xeroxed for me about Warden Burl Cain who oversees Louisiana State Penitentiary. According to this article Warden Cain is rhetorically granted Saint Hood because he turned America's largest super maximun security prison into a place of peace, dignity, and growth with a special emphasis on Christianity.

I was shocked to read this. My friend thought it would help inmates if we activists push other prisons to follow Warden Cain's example.

Me, I'm a little skeptical.

If everything I read in the article is true, I have to hear it from the inmates themselves. Prison wardens are virtually farmers. They herd people like ranchers herd cattle. I have seen many inmates get abused at the behest of prison security personnel and sometimes the top brass. I know the wardens and those closest to them are never officially made aware of these occurrences. Medical personnel sometimes minimize the extent of the injuries suffered upon abused inmates.

I'm not saying all prisons operate this way, But I've seen many that do.

So, I ask all of you who are in Angola to speak now or forever hold your peace.

If any of you know someone who is in Angola have them write me at the following address:

Tion Terrell
1099 F Beltline Rd
PMB 22
Collinsville, IL 62234

Lets find out if we are getting snow jobbed again by the media and those who control it. If I am wrong, we really have found a place where others can learn to be better prison overseers.

We can't lose!

Always real:
Supaman Tion Terrell

Tuesday, November 16, 2010

Things Are Looking Up

Having won the St Louis Poetry Slam competition, I have a great deal of respect for the competitors. However,  the poets I've seen for the past two months have blown me away.

There are a lot of things I don't like to do.  One of them is to admit when I've been bested. I'm honest about these things however, so I must tell you I'm a little afraid of the guys I expect to compete against .
At my best I am still not a sure winner in tomorrows competition.

I get a real thrill from being my best. I can't say I've been there in a long time. Sometimes you forget your way and the wrong things somehow make the good things look less appealing to you. But, I'm only a human. Sometimes you have to face the music.

But that is what life is about. I want to be at my best again. I deserve it.

You all deserve it too.

Always real:

Supaman Tion Terrell

Sunday, November 14, 2010

Opportunity for Progress

Some of you will note that I have created a new Facebook Group to work in unison with the United Coalition of Advocates for Prisoners. It is the United Coaliton of Advocates for Prisoners (U.C.A.P.) Support Group. http://www.facebook.com/home.php?sk=group_128762800513516&ap=1

I want you all to know this group was not created to compete with any other existing group. It was created because many have agreed with me that the coalition's vision for a comprehensive support group would best be implemented if a new group were formed and had clear objectives and plans for achieving them.

At this time, there are only a few members who have been selected and prepped to play critical roles in the groups development and direction. I wish not to have any activists take offense to their not being included at this time. I don't know everyone involved in our mutual fight. Therefore, I may have left out some very qualified persons due to ignorance.

If any of you are interested in aiding us in the growth of a group that will, not only, advocate for prisoners, but will also support them and their loved ones, as well as assist them by compiling and disseminating resource information, please complete the registration form at Supaman Scribes: http://www.supamanscribes.com/prisoner-and-family-support-group.php

It is time the coalition took on more responsibility than we were previously prepared to. It will take more than distributing finances to others, and my writing about problems, to fix them. The coalition has much to offer in the knowledge and experience of it's members. It is my responsibility, and our member's obligation, to offer everything we can in a comprehensive package through an organization that has been established to meet specific goals that will empower all interested parties to work towards effectively changing a corrupt system.

I implore any of you who are serious about activism to register for membership and make it known to us what you can bring to this organization, and what you expect/need from us. We will move forward with sure direction so that we will effectively be able to gauge our progress and thereby be able to improve ourselves as persons and activists as we continue to meet goals. In coming months, we expect some employment opportunities to be available too.

Always real:
Supaman Tion Terrell

Thursday, November 11, 2010

Keep Getting Better

Last night's blogtalk radio interview did a lot for me.

Having to vocalize so many of the things I've only thought and/or written about forces me to take a good look at myself.

I haven't been living up to my full potential. I've been preoccupied with too many things and people as of late.

I have a lot to do, and I'm making progress. However, a man of my potential has to expect more from himself.

I work hard at what I do as an activist. I work hard at my businesses. I don't work hard enough on myself however, and that spells failure in the long run no matter how hard I work at everything else.

So, some of you may notice that I don't have time for a lot of the things I used to do.  Please take no offense. I hope you can understand that I need some time to prepare myself for the next leg of the journey of life.

Always real,

Supaman Tion Terrell

Tuesday, November 9, 2010

Radio Interview Tomorrow 8pm (central time)

Yesterday, I received a call from Kevin W. Womble Sr (I Be the Wise) who informed me that he would like to have me be a guest on Blogtalk Radio. He was on my website at the time of the call. He was impressed by my ability to achieve so much in less than a year after my release.

I was so ecstatic I can hardly remember what was said during the discourse.

Tomorrow at 8pm (central time), I will be a guest on the www.blogtalkradio.com/ibthewise1 Internet Radio Show. I will be discussing the steps taken that have lead to my successes as well as my failures. Listeners can call in to ask questions during the interview as well. I suggest that anyone who has a loved one who will be returning to society, and any ex-con who has recently done so, listen to this show. Also, The Hard Journey Home is a must read for people in either situation, as well as the incarcerated persons who will be reentering society. The book can be ordered prebublication at http://www.supamanscribes.com/ .

I'm a little nervous (which hasn't happened since my release.) When I set the goal to prove to the world that anyone can be whatever they want to be despite their past, I really didn't understand everything that I would have to do to prove my point. My ignorance does not discourage me. I see it as growth opportunity. There is still a lot I need to learn and I won't learn anything by being afraid.

I've done public speaking and live radio commercials before, but this interview will be the first of it's magnitude since my release. I'm a bit out of practice after ten years of prison. I feel so many emotions it is hard for me to write this post.

Regardless of the emotional storm I'm enduring, I can't forget to give credit to those who supported me when I was just another ex-con with seemingly nothing to offer society but continued criminal behavior. I named these persons on my website  http://www.supamanscribes.com/ ,but I still have to include First United Presbyterian Church of Collinsville and also Pastor Mike Watkins of CAMA's Helping Hands Ministries who have supported me and still tolerate me after I've been such a hassle due to the ignorance mentioned above. First and foremost however I must give credit to God though I doubt my spiritual beliefs are compatible with most people's.

This morning I will head off to work wearing a nervous smile because though I've fallen way short of God's and many people's expectations, I know I'm still doing many things right. The good works I do are still shining through and are opening doors I never imagined.

Always real;
Supaman Tion Terrell

Saturday, November 6, 2010

Good Morning

My body is sore from hard work and my 50+hr week is not yet over.
My stomach is upset and I have a slight headache that promises to get worse.
I shall not complain.

Flashbacks in the forms of dreams haunt my sleep.
Reminding me of the many wrongs I committed while I lived life as a self-destructive fool.
At least now I'm a better person.

Still I burn bridges because of ignorance despite my good intentions.
Enemies, who were once friends, find ways to harass me to get revenge.
My true friends still pick me up when I'm down.

Failures multiply each day.
I keep falling short on the willpower I need to meet certain agendas.
My successes are few in comparison, but they are far greater.

I'm hated by many who hardly know me.
Mostly due to prejudices that are justified via my mistakes.
I'm loved by a few who make life worth living.

This morning is a good morning.
I can keep fighting to better myself and to be the man I know God expects me to be.
Love strengthens me when I feel weak.

Love is the most powerful emotion that a human can feel.
For a decade I feared I would never know love again.
My cup runneth over.

I close my eyes to see the face of one whom I know I was destined to love.
Dreaming of the day we shall find happily ever after.
I wonder constantly if happily ever after can be reality.

Who will I be if this love fades?
Surely my life will never be the same.
Letting go might break me.

And, so, I cherish each moment during which I can occupy her attention.
I taste the tears we've shed together and still I savor them.
They are nearly as sweet as the the love we made when we made up.

I lick my wounds as I count my blessings.
Loving her is what I was born to do.
Yes. This is a good morning.

Friday, November 5, 2010

My Place in Society

When life is good we tend to forget the hard times and the people who got us through them. Well, I don't have that problem because everyday of my life is an uphill battle. I count this as a blessing because I never have time to get lazy nor content. I also appreciate being reminded how much real love from friends and family means to me.

I'm sure you all have dealt with the good intention having promise makers that don't come through when you need them. I have dealt with that type all my life. I'm so used to it now that I don't trust much of what I'm told now days. But, then I have the people whom I know are behind me. I don't bother with asking them for what is needed. I know already they will be there whenever they possibly can. I'm sure they know they can expect the same from me.
I am grateful for these friends.

I obvious;y have my share of enemies too.  They are a big help to me as well since their attempts to derail or undermine me are not only entertaining, they stir up just enough pride and sometimes anger to make me work harder. Besides, as they say, I must be great if I'm on another person's mind so much that they have to try to push my buttons. Not to mention they are cowards who won't chance a real confrontation.

Either way, I have a job to do. I believe I'm doing quite well at it thanks to the aid and guidance I get from those persons who want me to successfully adjust to society. Meanwhile, I'm doing all I can to make the task easier for future ex-cons, and trying to steer young people away from crime.

We all have roles to play in life. I'm glad I discovered mine and that I've been blessed with all that I need to accomplish what I must. I wish the same for everyone.